My Immortal: The G-Rated Version
by The Parody Master
Summary: The Tara Gilesbie classic has been thoroughly bowdlerized and is now appropriate for the whole family!
1. Chapters 1-11

Chapter 1.

Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da heck out of here!). I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major loving dreamboat. I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I did a thumbs-down at them.

"Hey Ebony!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy!

"What's up Draco?" I asked.

"Nothing." he said shyly.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

Chapter 2.

The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again. I opened the door of my sleeping box and drank some tomato juice from a bottle I had. My sleeping box was black ebony and inside it was hot pink velvet with black lace on the ends. I got out of my sleeping box and took of my giant MCR t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a black leather dress, a pentagram necklace, combat boots and black fishnets on. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair in a kind of messy bun.

My friend, Willow (AN: Raven dis is u!) woke up then and grinned at me. She flipped her long waist-length raven black hair with pink streaks and opened her forest-green eyes. She put on her Marilyn Manson t-shirt with a black mini, fishnets and pointy high-heeled boots. We put on our makeup (black lipstick white foundation and black eyeliner.)

"OMLG, I saw you talking to Draco Malfoy yesterday!" she said excitedly.

"Yeah? So?" I said, blushing.

"Do you like Draco?" she asked as we went out of the Slytherin common room and into the Great Hall.

"No I so loving don't!" I shouted.

"Yeah right!" she exclaimed. Just then, Draco walked up to me.

"Hi." he said.

"Hi." I replied nicely.

"Guess what." he said.

"What?" I asked.

"Well, Good Charlotte are having a concert in Hogsmeade." he told me.

"Oh. My. Loving. Gosh!" I screamed. I love GC. They are my favorite band, besides MCR.

"Well…. do you want to go with me?" he asked.

I gasped.

Chapter 3.

On the night of the concert I put on my black lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them were ripped red fishnets. Then I put on a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. I put on matching fishnet on my arms. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky. I felt a little depressed then, so I got a paper cut. I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop hurting and I listened to some GC. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. Then I put on some black lipstick. I didn't put on foundation because I was pale anyway. I drank some tomato juice so I was ready to go to the concert.

I went outside. Draco was waiting there in front of his flying car. He was wearing a Simple Plan t-shirt (they would play at the show too), baggy black skater pants, black nail polish and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl boiz wer it ok!).

"Hi Draco!" I said in a depressed voice.

"Hi Ebony." he said back. We walked into his flying black Mercedes-Benz (the license plate said 123) and flew to the place with the concert. On the way we listened excitedly to Good Charlotte and Marilyn Manson. We both smoked salmon and fish. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Good Charlotte.

"You come in cold, you're covered in tomato juice

They're all so happy you've arrived

The doctor removes your rope, hands you to your mom

She sets you free into this life." sang Joel (I don't own da lyrics 2 dat song).

"Joel is so loving wholesome." I said to Draco, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.

Suddenly Draco looked sad.

"What's wrong?" I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.

"Hey, it's ok I don't like him better than YOU!" I said.

"Really?" asked Draco sensitively and he put his arm around me all protective.

"Really." I said. "Besides I don't even know Joel and he's going out with Hilary loving Duff. I loving hate that little witch." I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face.

The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Draco. After the concert, we drank some soda and asked Benji and Joel for their autographs and photos with them. We got GC concert tees. Draco and I crawled back into the Mercedes-Benz, but Draco didn't go back into Hogwarts, instead he drove the car into… the Forbidden Forest!

Chapter 4.

"DRACO!" I shouted. "What the love do you think you are doing?"

Draco didn't answer but he stopped the flying car and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.

"What the loving heck?" I asked angrily.

"Ebony?" he asked.

"What?" I snapped.

Draco leaned in extra-close and I looked into his gothic red eyes (he was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and rudeness and then suddenly I didn't feel mad anymore.

And then… suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my shoes and I took of his shirt. I even took of my socks. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.

"Oh! Oh! Oh! " I screamed. I was beginning to get a kiss. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then….

"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERLOVERS!"

It was….Dumbledore!

Chapter 5.

Dumbledore made and Draco and I follow him. He kept shouting at us angrily.

"You ludacris fools!" he shouted.

I started to cry tears of tomato juice down my pallid face. Draco comforted me. When we went back to the castle Dumbledore took us to Professor Snape and Professor McGonagall who were both looking very angry.

"They were having a kiss in the Forbidden Forest!" he yelled in a furious voice.

"Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?" asked Professor McGonagall.

"How dare you?" demanded Professor Snape.

And then Draco shrieked. "BECAUSE I LOVE HER!"

Everyone was quiet. Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall still looked mad but Professor Snape said. "Fine. Very well. You may go up to your rooms."

Draco and I went upstairs while the teachers glared at us.

"Are you okay, Ebony?" Draco asked me gently.

"Yeah I guess." I lied. I went to the girl's dorm and brushed my teeth and my hair and changed into a low-cut black floor-length dress with red lace all around it and black high heels. When I came out….

Draco was standing in front of the bathroom, and he started to sing 'I just wanna live' by Good Charlotte. I was so flattered, even though he wasn't supposed to be there. We hugged and kissed. After that, we said goodnight and he reluctantly went back into his room.

Chapter 6.

The next day I woke up in my sleeping box. I put on a black miniskirt that was all ripped around the end and a matching top with red faces all over it and high heeled boots that were black. I put on two pairs of face earrings, and two crosses in my ears. I spray-painted my hair with purple.

In the Great Hall, I ate some Count Chocula cereal with tomato juice instead of milk, and a glass of red tomato juice. Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the tomato juice spilled over my top.

"Rascal!" I shouted angrily. I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the pale white face of a gothic boy with spiky black hair with red streaks in it. He was wearing so much eyeliner that I was going down his face and he was wearing black lipstick. He didn't have glasses anymore and now he was wearing red contact lenses just like Draco's and there was no scar on his forhead anymore. He had a manly stubble on his chin. He had a friendly English accent. He looked exactly like Joel Madden. He was so friendly that my eyes got hearts in them when I saw him kind of like a cartoon only I'm real so it didn't actually happen you fool.

"I'm so sorry." he said in a shy voice.

"That's all right. What's your name?" I questioned.

"My name's Harry Potter, although most people call me Vampire these days." he grumbled.

"Why?" I exclaimed.

"Because I love the taste of tomato juice." he giggled.

"Well, I am a vampire." I confessed.

"Really?" he whimpered.

"Yeah." I roared.

We sat down to talk for a while. Then Draco came up behind me and told me he had a surprise for me so I went away with him

Chapter 7. Bring me 2 life

Draco and I held our pale white hands with black nail polish as we went upstairs. I was wearing red rebellious sings on my nails in red nail polish (AN: c doez dat sound lik a Maru Sue 2 u?). I waved to Vampire. Dark misery was in his depressed eyes. I guess he was jealous of me that I was going out with Draco. Anyway, I went upstairs excitedly with Draco. We went into his room and didn't close the door. Then…

We started frenching passively and we took off each others shoes enthusiastically. He didn't touch me inappropriately as I took of my socks. Then I took off my black leather jacket and he took off his shirt. We didn't go on the bed and started making out clothed and then he put his boy's thingy in mine and we HAD A KISS. (c is dat stupid?)

"Oh Draco, Draco!" I screamed while getting a kiss when all of a sudden I saw a tattoo I had never seen before on Draco's arm. It was a black heart with an arrow through it. On it in ruddy gothic writing were the words… Vampire!

I was so angry.

"You rascal!" I shouted angrily, jumping onto the bed.

"No! No! But you don't understand!" Draco pleaded. But I knew too much.

"No, you loving idiot!" I shouted. "You've probably been too friendly anyway!"

I put on my other clothes all huffily and then stomped out. Draco ran out even though he was shirtless. He had a really big you-know-what but I was too mad to care. I stomped out and did so until I was in Vampire's classroom where he was having a lesson with Professor Snape and some other people.

"VAMPIRE POTTER, YOU MOTHERLOVER!" I yelled.

Chapter 8.

Everyone in the class stared at me and then Draco came into the room even though he was shirtless and started begging me to take him back.

"Ebony, it's not what you think!" Draco screamed sadly.

My friend R'uddy Mary Smith smiled at me understatedly. She flipped her long waste-length gothic black hair and opened her crimson eyes like tomato juice that she was wearing contact lenses on. She had pale white skin that she was wearing white makeup on. Hermione was misplaced when she was born. Her real parents are vampires and one of them is a witch but Voldemort hurt her mother and her father got hurt because he was depressed about it. She still has nightmares about it and she is very haunted and depressed. It also turns out her real last name is Smith and not Granger. (Since she has converted to rebelliousness she is in Slytherin now not Griffindoor. )

"What is it that you desire, you ridiculous dimwit!" Snape demeaned angrily in his cold voice but I ignored him.

"Vampire, I can't believe you cheated on me with Draco!" I shouted at him.

Everyone gasped.

I don't know why Ebony was so mad at me. I had went out with Vampire (I'm bi and so is Ebony) for a while but then he broke my heart. He dumped me because he liked Britney, a stupid preppy lover. We were just good friends now. He had gone through horrible problems, and now he was gothic. (Haha, like I would hang out with a prep.)

"But I'm not going out with Draco anymore!" said Vampire.

"Yeah loving right! Love off, you rascal!" I screamed. I ran out of the room and into the Forbidden Forest where I had had my first kiss with Draco and then I started to bust into tears.

Chapter 9.

I was so mad and sad. I couldn't believe Draco for cheating on me. I began to cry against the tree where I had had a kiss with Draco.

Then all of a suddenly, an horrible man with red eyes and no nose and everything started flying towards me on a broomstick! He didn't have a nose (basically like Voldemort in the movie) and he was wearing all black but it was obvious he wasn't gothic. It was… Voldemort!

"No!" I shouted in a scared voice but then Voldemort shouted "Imperius!" and I couldn't run away.

"Crookshanks!" I shouted at him. Voldemort fell of his broom and started to scream. I felt bad for him even though I'm a scamp so I stopped.

"Ebony." he yelled. "Thou must hurt Vampire Potter!"

I thought about Vampire and his friendlah eyes and his gothic black hair and how his face looks just like Joel Madden. I remembered that Draco had said I didn't understand, so I thought, what if Draco went out with Vampire before I went out with him and they broke up?

"No, Voldemort!" I shouted back.

Voldemort gave me a squirt gun. "No! Please!" I begged.

"Thou must!" he yelled. "If thou does not, then I shall hurt thy beloved Draco!"

"How did you know?" I asked in a surprised way.

Voldemort got a dude-ur-so-special look on his face. "I hath telekinesis." he answered cruelly. "And if you doth not hurt Vampire, then thou know what will happen to Draco!" he shouted. Then he flew away angrily on his broomstick.

I was so scared and mad I didn't know what to do. Suddenly Draco came into the woods.

"Draco!" I said. "Hi!"

"Hi." he said back but his face was all sad. He was wearing white foundation and messy eyeliner kind of like a pentagram (geddit) between Joel Madden and Gerard Way.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"No." he answered.

"I'm sorry I got all mad at you but I thought you cheated on me." I expelled.

"That's okay." he said all depressed and we went back into Hogwarts together making out.

Chapter 10.

I was really scared about Vlodemort all day. I was even upset went to rehearsals with my gothic metal band Ruddy Gothic Rose 123. I am the lead singer of it and I play guitar. People say that we sound like a cross between GC, Slipknot and MCR. The other people in the band are R'uddy Mary, Vampire, Draco, Ron (although we call him Meanie now. He has black hair now with blue streaks in it.) and Hargrid. Only today Draco and Vampire were depressed so they weren't coming and we wrote songs instead. I knew Draco was probably getting a paper cut (he wouldn't get hurt because he was a vampire too and the only way you can hurt a vampire is with a c-r-o-s-s (there's no way I'm writing that) or a steak) and Vampire was probably watching a depressing movie like The Corpse Bride. I put on a black leather shirt that showed off my collar bone and modest matching miniskirt that said Simple Plan on the back. You might think I'm too friendly but I'm really not.

We were singing a cover of 'Helena' and at the end of the song I suddenly bust into tears.

"Ebony! Are you OK?" R'uddy Mary asked in a concerted voice.

"What the love do you think?" I asked angrily. And then I said. "Well, Voldemort came and the loving rascal told me to loving hurt Harry! But I don't want to hurt him, because, he's really nice, even if he did go out with Draco. But if I don't hurt Harry, then Voldemort, will loving hurt Draco!" I burst into tears.

Suddenly Draco jumped out from behind a wall.

"Why didn't you loving tell me!" he shouted. "How could you- you- you loving poser muggle witch!" (c is dat out of character?)

I started to cry and cry. Draco started to cry too all sensitive. Then he ran out crying.

We practiced for one more hour. Then suddenly Dumbeldore walked in angrily! His eyes were all fiery and I knew this time it wasn't cause he had a headache.

"What have you done!" He started to cry wisely. (c dats basically nut swering and dis time he wuz relly upset n u wil c y) "Ebony Draco has been found in his room. He got hurt by getting a paper cut."

Chapter 11.

"NO!" I screamed. I was horrorfied! R'uddy Mary tried to comfort me but I told her love off and I ran to my room crying myself. Dumbledore chased after me shouting but he had to stop when I went into my room cause he would look too friendly that way.

Anyway, I started crying tears of tomato juice and then I got a paper cut. They got all over my jacket so I took it off and jumped onto the bed angrily while I put on a Linkin Park song at full volume. I grabbed a steak and almost stuck it into my heart to get hurt. I was so loving depressed! I got off of the bed and put on a black low-cut dress with lace all over it sandly. I put on black high heels with pink metal stuff on the ends and six pairs of face earrings. I couldn't loving believe it. Then I looked out the window and screamed… Snap was spying on me and he was taking a video tape of me! And Loopin was enjoying it! They were sitting on their broomsticks.

"EW, YOU LOVING RASCALS, STOP LOOKING AT ME WITHOUT MY JACKET! ARE YOU TOO FRIENDLY OR WHAT!" I screamed putting on a black towel with a picture of Marilyn Mason on it. Suddenly Vampire ran in.

"Abra Kedavra!" he yelled at Snape and Loopin pointing his womb. I took my squirt gun and shot Snape and Loopin a gazillion times and they both started screaming and the camera broke. Suddenly, Dumblydore ran in. "Ebony, it has been revealed that someone has - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he shouted looking at Snape and Loopin and then he waved his wand and suddenly…

Hargrid ran outside on his broom and said everyone we need to talk.

"What do you know, Hargrid? You're just a little Hogwarts student!"

"I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT…." Hargirid paused angrily. "BUT I AM ALSO A REBEL!"

"This cannot be." Snap said in a crisp voice as tomato juice dripped from his hand where Dumblydore's wand had shot him. "There must be other factors."

"YOU DON'T HAVE ANY!" I yelled in madly.

Loopin held up the camera triumelephantly. "The lens may be ruined but the tape is still there!"

I felt faint, more than I normally do like how it feels when you do not drink enough tomato juice.

"Why are you doing this?" Loopin said angrily while he rubbed his dirty hands on his clook.

And then I heard the words that I had heard before but not from him. I did not know whether to feel shocked and happy or to hurt him and drink his tomato juice because I felt faint.

"BECAUSE…BECAUSE…." Hargid said and he paused in the air dramitaclly, waving his wand in the air. Then swooped he in singing to the tune of a gothic version of a song by 50 Cent.

"Because you're goffic?" Snap asked in a little afraid voice cause he was afraind it meant he was connected with rebelliousness.

"Because I LOVE HER!"


	2. Chapters 12-22

Chapter 12.

I was about to get a paper cut again with the piece of paper that Drago had given me in case anything happened to him. He had told me to use it valiantly against an enemy but I knew that we must both get hurt together.

"NO!" I THOUGHT IT WAS HAIRgrid but it was Vampire. He started to scream. "OMLG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!" and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites.

I stopped. "How did u know?"

"I saw it! And my scar turned back into the lightning bolt!"

"NO!" I ran up closer. "I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!" I shouted.

"I do but Meanie changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation." he said back. "Anyway my scar hurt and it turned back into the lightning bolt! Save me! then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco….Volfemort has him bondage!"

Anyway I was in the school nurse's office now recovering from my paper cut. Snap and Loopin and HAHRID were there too. They were going to St. Mango's after they recovered cause they were too friendly and you can't have those loving rascals teaching in a school with lots of wholesome gurlz. Dumbledore had wholesomely confiscated the cideo camera they took of me without my jacket. I did a thumbs-down at them.

Anyway Hargrid came into my hospital bed holding a bouquet of pink roses.

"Enoby I need to tell u somethnig." he said in a v. serious voice, giving me the roses.

"Love off." I told him. "You know I loving hate the color pink anyway, and I don't like loved up preps like you." I snapped. Hargrid had been mean to me before for being gottik.

"No Enoby." Hargrid says. "Those are not roses."

"What, are they goffs too you poser prep?" I asked cause I was angry that he had brought me pink roses.

"I saved your life!" He yelled angrily. "No you didn't I replied." "You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton j- video made from your jacket scene and being vued by Snap and Loopin." Who ENJOYED it he added silently.

"Whatever!" I yelled angirly.

He pointed his wand at the pink roses. "These aren't roses." He suddenly looked at them with a rude look in his eye and muttered Well If you wanted Honesty that's all you haD TO SAY! .

"That's not a spell that's an MCR song." I corrected him wisely.

"I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes." Then he screamed. "Petulus merengo mi kremicli romacio(4 all u cool goffic mcr fans out, there, that is a tribute! specially for raven I love you girl!)imo noto okayo!"

And then the roses turned into a huge black flame floating in the middle of the air. And it was black. Now I knew he wasn't a prep.

"OK I believe you now wtl is Drako?"

Hairgrid rolled his eyes. I looked into the balls of flame but I could c nothing.

"U c, Enobby," Dumblydore said, watching the two of us watching the flame. "2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA U REVIEWRS FLAMES GEDDIT) u mst find urslf 1st, k?"

"I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD MAN!" Hargrid yelled. dUMBLydore lookd shockd. I guess he didn't have a headache or else he would have said something back.

Hairgrid stormed off back into his bed. "U r a liar, prof dumbledoree!"

Anyway when I got better I went upstairs and put on a black leather minidress that was all ripped on the ends with lace on it. There was some corset stuff on the front. Then I put on black fishnets and black high-heeled boots with pictures of Billie Joe Armstrong on them. I put my hair all out around me so I looked like Samara from the Ring (if u don't know who she iz ur a prep so lov off!) and I put on dark-red lipstick, black eyeliner and black lip gloss.

"You look kawai, girl." R'uddy Mary said sadly. "Fangs (geddit) you do too." I said sadly too, but I was still upset. I got a paper cut feeling totally depressed and I drank all the tomato juice. I cried again in my bedroom and put the shades on so Snap and Loopin couldn't spy on me this time. I went to some classes. Vampire was in the Hair of Magical Magic Creatures. He looked all depressed because Draco had disappeared and he had used to be in love with Draco. He was taking some tomato juice from a Hufflepuff.

"Hi." he said in a depressed way. "Hi back." I said in an wqually said way.

We both looked at each other for some time. Harry had beautiful red gothic eyes so much like Dracos. Then… we went up to each other and started kissing each other.

"STOP IT NOW YOU EAGER SIMPLETONS!" shouted Professor McGoggle who was watching us and so was everyone else.

"Vampire you lover!" I said not using violence. "Stop trying to kiss me. You know I loved Draco!" I shouted and then I ran away angrily.

Just then he started to scream. "OMLG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!" and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites.

"NO!" I ran up closer.

"I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!" I shouted.

"I do but Meanie changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation." he said back. "Anyway my scar hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco….Volfemort has him bondage!"

Chapter 13.

Vampire and I ran up the stairs looking for Dumbledore. We were so scared.

"Dumbledore Dumblydore!" we both yelled. Dumbledore came there.

"What is it that you want now you despicable snobs?" he asked angrily.

"Volsemort has Draco!" we shouted at the same time.

He laughed in a rude voice.

"No! Don't! We need to save Draco!" we begged.

"No." he said meanly. "I don't give a darn what Voldemort does to Draco. Not after how much he misbehaved in school especially with YOU Ebony." he said while he frowned looking at me. "Besides I never liked him that much anyway." then he walked away. Vampire started crying. "My Draco!" he moaned. (AN: don't u fik gay guyz r lik so wholesome!)

"Its okay!" I tried to tell him but that didn't stop him. He started to cry tears of tomato juice. Then he had a brainstorm. "I had an idea!" he exclaimed.

"What?" I asked him.

"You'll see." he said. He took out his wand and did a spell. Then… suddenly we were in Voldemprt's lair!

We ran in with our wands out just as we heard a croon voice say. "Allah Kedavra!"

It was….. Voldemort!

Chapter 14.

We ran to where Volcemort was. It turned out that Voldemort wasn't there. Instead the fat guy who hurt Cedric was. Draco was there crying tears of tomato juice. Snaketail was hurting him. Vampire and I ran in front of Snaketail.

"Rid my sight you despicable preps!" he shouted as we started shooting him with the squirt gun he Then suddenly he looked at me and he fell down with a lovey-dovey look in his eyes. "EbonyIloveyouwiluhaveakisswithme." he said. (in dis he is sixteen yrs old so hes not too friendly ok)

"Huh?" I asked. "Enoby I love you will you have a kiss with me?" asked Snaketail. I started laughing crudely. "What the love? You hurt my bf and then you expect me to love you? Gosh, you are so loved up you loving rascal." I said angrily. Then I hurt one of his pockets. Tomato juice pored out of it like a fountain.

"Nooooooooooooo!" he screamed. He started screaming and running around. Then he fell down and got hurt. I brust into tears sadly.

"Snaketail what art thou doing?" called Voldemort. Then… he started coming! We could hear his high heels clacking to us. So we got on our broomsticks and we flew to Hogwarts. We went to my room. Vampire went away. There I started crying.

"What's wrong honey?" asked Draco taking off his shirt because it was dirty and for no other reason at all. He had a sax-pack (geddit cuz he plays the sax) and a really huge you-know-what and everything.

"Its so unfair!" I yielded. "Why can't I just be ugly or plain like all da other girls and preps here except for R'uddy Mary, because she's not ugly or anything."

"Why would you wanna be ugly? I don't like the preps anyway. They are such loving rascals." answered Draco.

"Yeah but everyone is in love with me! Like Snape and Loopin took a video of me without my jacket. Hargrid says he's in love with me. Vampire likes me and now even Snaketail is in love with me! I just wanna be with you ok Draco! Why couldn't rebelliousness have made me less beautiful?" I shouted angrily. (an" don't wory enoby isn't a snob or anyfing but a lot of ppl hav told her shes pretty) "Im good at too many things! WHY CAN'T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT'S A LOVING CURSE!" I shouted and then I ran away.

Chapter 15.

"Ebony Ebony!" shouted Draco sadly. "No, please, come back!"

But I was too mad.

"Whatever! Now u can go anh have a kiss with Vampire!" I shouted. I stormed into my room and closed my black door with my dark-red key. It had a picture of Marylin Manson on it. He looked so friendly in a way that reminded me of Draco and Vampire. I started to cry and weep. I took a piece of paper and started to get a paper cut. I drank some tomato juice all depressed. Then I looked at my black GC watch and noticed it was time to go to Biology class.

I put on a modest ripped black gothic dress that said Anarchy on the front in dark red letters and was all ripped and a spiky belt. Under that I put on ripped black fishnets and boots that said Joel all over them with dark red letters. I put my ebony black hair out. Anyway I went downstairs feeling all sad and depressed as usual. I did sum advanced Biology work. I was turning a ruddy pentagram into a black guitar. Suddenly the guitar turned to Draco!

"Enoby I love you!" he shouted sadly. "I dnot care what those lover preps and posers fink. Ur da most beautiful girl in the world. Before I met you I used to want to get hurt all the time. Now I just wanna loving be with you. I loving love you!." Then…. he started to sing "Da Chronicles of Life and Getting Hurt" (we considered it our song now cuz we fell in love when Joel was singing it) right in front of the entire class! His singing voice was so amazing and gothic and friendlly like a cross between Gerard, Joel, Chester, Pierre and Marilyn Manson (AN: don't u fink dos guyz r so wholesome. if u dnot no who dey r get da lov out od hr!) .

"OMLG." I said after he was finished. Some loving preps stared at us but I just made two thumbs down (that were covered in black nail polish and were entwined with Draco's now) at them. "I love you!" I said and then we started to kiss just like Hilary Duff (i lovin h8 dat witch) and CMM in a Cinderella Story. Then we went away holding hands. Loopin shouted at us but he stopped cuz everyone was clapping by how friendly we looked 2gether. Then I saw a poster saying that MCR would have a concert in Hogsmede right then. We looked at each other all shocked and then we went 2gether.

Chapter 16.

We ran happily to Hogsmede. There we saw the stage where GC had played. We ran in happly. MCR were there playing 'Helena'. I was so loving happy! Gerard looked even friendlier than he did in da pictures. Even Draco thought so, I could totally see him getting goo-goo eyes but it didn't matter cuz I knew know that we were da only true ones for eachother. I was wearing a black leather minidress and black leather platinum boots with red ripped fishnets. Draco was wearing a black baggy MCR t-shirt and black baggy pants. Anyway, we stated moshing to Helena. We frenched. We ran up 2 the front of the band to stage-dive. Suddenly, Gerard pulled off his mask. So did the others. We gasped. It wasn't them at all. It was.,….. Volsemort and da Hurt Dealers!

"Wtl Draco im not going to a concert wid u!" I shouted angrily. "Not after what happened to me last time? Even if its MCR n u no how much I lik them"

"What cause we…you know…" he gadgetted uncomfortbli cause guys don't like to talk a bout you-know-what.

"Yeah cause we you know!" I yielded in an angry voice.

"We won't do that again." Draco promised. "This time, we're going with an ESCORT."

"OMLG wtl/ Are you giving into the mainstream?" I asked. "So I guess ur a prep or a Christina or what now?"

"NO." he muttered loudly.

"R u becoming a prep or what?" I shootd angrily.

"Enoby! I'm not! Pls come with me!" He fell down to his knees and started singing 'Da world is black' by GC to me.

I was flattened cause that's not even a single, he had memorized da lyrks just 4 me!

"OK then I guess I will have to." I said and then we frenched 4 a while and I went up 2 my room.

R'uddy Mary was standing there. "Hajimemashite gurl." she said happily (she spex Japanese so do i. dat menz 'how do u do' in japanese). "BTW Willow that loving poser got expuld. she failed al her klasses and she skepped math." (an: RAVEN U LOVIN SUK! LOV U!)

"It serves that loving wich right." I laughed angrily.

Well anyway we where felling all deprezzed. We wutsched some goffic movies like Das niteMARE b4 xmas. "Maybe Willow will get hurt too." I said.

"Kawai." R'uddy Mair shook her head enrgtically lethrigcly. "Oh yeah o have a confession after she got expuld I hurt her and den loopin kissed her on the cheek cause he's too friendly."

"Kawai." I commnted happily . We talked to each other in silence for da rest uv da movie.

"OH HEY BTw, im going to a concert with drako tonight in Hogsmeade with mcr." I sed. " I need to wear like da most wholesome outfit EVA."

R'Uddy Mairy Nodded ENREGeticALLlY. "Omlg totally lets go shopping."

"In Hot Topic, right?" I asked, already getting out my spshcial Hot Topic Loiyalty carde.

"No." My head snaped up.

'WHAT?" my head spuin. I could not believe it. "R'Uddy Mary are u a PREP?"

"NOOOO!NOOOO!" She laughed. "I found some cool goffic stores near Hogwarts that's all."

"Hu told u abut them" I askd sure it would be Drako or Meanie or Vampire(don't even SAY that nam to me!). Or me.

"Dumblydore." She sed. "Let me just call our broms."

"OMLLG DUMBLYDORE?" I asked quietly.

"Yah I saw the map for Hogsmeade on his desk." She told me. "Come on let's go."

We were going in a few punkgoff stores SPECIALLY for the concerts in Hogsmeade. The salesperson was OMG MORE WHOLESOME THAN GERARD EXCEPT NOT CAUSE THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE and he gave me a few dresses. "We only have these for da real goffs."

"Da real goffs?" Me and R'Uddy Mary asked.

"Yah u wouldn't believe how many posers ther are in this town man! Yesterday loopin and snap tried to buy a goffic camera pouch." He shook his head. "I dint even no they had a camera."

"OMLG NO THEIR GONNA SPY ON ME AGAIN!" I cried, running out of the changing room wearing a long black dress with lots of red tulle coming out and not very low-cut with a small slit.

"Oh my rebel you have to buy that outfit" The salesperson said.

"Yeah it looks totlly wholesome." said R'Uddy Mary.

"You know what I am gona give it to you free cause u look really wholesome in that utfit. Hey are you gonna be at the concert tonight?" he asked.

"Yeah I am actually." I looked back at him. "Hey BTW my name's ebondy dark'ness dementia TARA way what's yours?"

"Tom Rid." He said and ran a hand through his black-dyed hair. "maybe I'll see you there tonight."

"Yeah I don't think so cause I am going there with my bf drako you mischievous scamp!" I yelled angrily, but before he could beg me to go with him, Hargrid flew in on his black broom looking worried. "OMLG EBONDY U NEED OT GET BACK INTO THE CASTLE NOW!"

Chapter 17.

Tom Riddle gave us some clothes n stuff 4 free. He said he wud help us wif makeup if he wunted koz he was relly in2 fashin n stuff. (hes bisezual). Hargird kept shooting at us to come wholesomely back 2 Hogwarts. "WTL Hargrid?" I shouted angrily. "Love off you ljoving rascal." Well anyway Willow came. Hargird went away angrily.

"Hey witch you look kawaii." she said.

"Yah but not as kawaii as you." I answered sadly cause Willow's really pretty and everything. She was wearing a modest black corset-thingy with dark red lace on it and a blak dark-red miniskirt, leather fish-nets and black poiny boots that showed off how pale she wuz. She had a really nice body wif a collar bone and everything. She was thin enouff 2 be healthy and definitely not any more thin than that.

"So r u going 2 da concert wif Draco?" she asked.

"Yah." I said happily.

"I'm gong with Meanie." she anserred happily. Well anyway Draco and Meanie came. They were both loking extremely wholesome and friendly and u could tell they thoufht we were olesome 2. Meanie was wearing a black t-shirt that said '123' on it. He was wearing tons off makeup jus like Marylin Manson. Draco was wearing black leather pants, a gothic black GC t-shirt and black Vans he got from da Warped tower. R'uddy Mart was going 2 da concert wif Dracola. Dracola used to be called Navel but it tuned out dat he was misplaced at birth and his real family were vampires. They got hurt in a car crash. Navel converted to rebelliousness and he went goth. He was in Slitherin now. He was wearing a black Wurped t-shirt, black jeans and shoes and black hair wif red streekz in it. We kall him Dracula now. Well anyway we al went 2 Draco's black Mercy-Bens (geddit cuz wer gpffik) that his dad Lucian gave him. We ate cod, herring and mackerel. Draco and I made out. We made fun of dose stupid loving preps. We soon got there….I gapsed.

Gerard was da friendliest guy eva! He locked even friendlier den he did in pix. He had long raven blak hair n piercing blue eyes. He wuz really skinny and he had n amazing politically-correct voice. We moshed 2 Helena and sum odder songz. Sudenly Gerard polled of his mask. So did the other membez. I gasped. It wasn't Gerard at all! It was an ugly preppy man wif no nose and red eyes... Every1 ran away but me and Draco. Draco and I came. It was….Vlodemort and da Hurt Deelers!

"U moronic idiots!" he shooted angstily. "Enoby, I told u to hurt Vampire. Thou have failed. And now….I shall hurt thou and Draco!"

"No no please!" We begged sadly but he took out his plastic knife.

Sudenly a gothic old man flu in on his broomstick. He had lung black hair and a looong black bread. He wus werring a blak robe dat sed 'avril lavigne' on da back. He shotted a spel and Vlodemort ran away. It was…DUMBLYDORE!

Chapter 18.

I woke up the next day in my sleeping box. I walked out of it and put on some black eyeliner, black eyesharrow, dark-bed lipstick and a black not really low-cut leather dress that was all ripped and in stripes so you could see my belly, but not anything inappropriate. I was wearing a face belly ring with black and red diamonds inside it.

(Da night before Draco and I rent back to the skulk (geddit skulk koz im goffik n I like to skulk). Dumbeldore chased Vlodemort away. We flew there on our brooms. Mine was black and the broom-stuff was dark-red. There was lace all over it. Draco had a black MCR boom. We went back to our rooms and we had you-know-what to a Linkin Park song.)

Well anyway I went down to the Grate Hall. There all da walls were painted black and da tables were black too. But you fould see that there was pink pant underneath the black pant. And there were pastors of poser bands everywhere, like Ashlee Simpson and the Backstreet Boys.

"WTL!" I shouted going to sit next to R'uddy Mary and Willow. R'uddy Mary was wearing a black leather mini with a Good Chraloote t-shirt, black fishnets and black pointy boots. Willow was wearing a long gothic blak dress with dark red writing that was all lacy and came up to your thighs and black boots and fishnets. Vampire, Dracula and Draco came. We started to talk about who was friendlier, Mikey or Gerard Way or Billie Joe Armstrong. The boys joined in cause they were bi.

"Those guys are so loving wholesome." Navel was saying as suddenly a gothic old man with a black beard and everything came. He was the same one who had chassed away Vlodemort yesterday. He had normal tan skin but he was wearing white foundation and he had wholesomely dyed his hare black.

"….DUMBLEDORE?1!" we all gasped.

"WTL?" I shouted angrily. "I thought he was just wearing that to scare Volsemort!"

"Hello everyone." he said happily. "As u can see I gave the room a makeover. Whjat do u fink about it?"

Everyone from the poser table in Gryiffindoor started to cheer. Well we goths just looked at each other all disfusted and shook our heads. We couldn't believe what a poser he was!1.

"BTW you can call me Albert." HE CALLED AS WE LEFT to our classes.

"What a loving poser!" Draco shouted angrily as we we to Transfomation. We were holding hands. Vampire looked really jealous. I could see him crying tomato juice in a gothic way (geddit, way lik Gerard) but I didn't say anything. "I bet he's havin a mid-life crisis!" Willow shouted.

I was so loving angry.

Chapter 19. im nut ok i promise

All day we sat angerly finking about Dumbelldore. We were so loving frustrated. Well, I had one thing to look forward too- da MCR concert. It had been postphoned, so we could all go.

Anyway, I went to the common room sadly to study responsibly. Draco was being all secretive.

I asked what it was and he got all mad me and started crying all wholesome and angsty (rnt sensitve bi guyz so wholesome).

"No one loving understands me!1" he shouted angrily as his black hare went in his big blue eyes like Billie Joe in Boulevard of Borken Dreamz. He was wearing black baggy paints, a black MCR t-shirt and a black lie. (geddit insted of tie koz im goffik) I was wearing a blak leather low cut top with chains all over it all over it a blak leather mini, black high held boots and a cross belly fing. My hair was al up in a messy relly high bun like Amy Lee in Gong Under. (email me if u wana see da pik)

"Accuse me? What about me!" I growled.

"Buy-but-but-" he grunted.

"You loving rascal!" I moaned.

"No! Wait! It's not what it loving looks like!" he shouted.

But it was to late. I knew what I herd. I ran to the bathroom angrily, cring. Draco banged on the door. I whipped and whepped as my rudy eyeliner streammed down my cheeks and made cool tears down my wholesome face like Benji in the video for Girls and Bois (raven that is soo our video!). I TOOOK OUT A SALMON END STARTED TO eat sushi.

Suddenly Hargrid came. He had appearated.

"You gave me a loving shock!" I shouted angrily dropping my sushi. "Wtl do you fink you're doing in da gurl's room?"

Only it wasn't just Hargrid. Someone else was with him too! For a second I wanted it 2 b Tom Rid or maybe Draco but it was Dumblydore.

"Hey I need to ask you a question." he said, pulling out his black wanabe-goffik purse. "What are u wearing to the concert?"

"U no who MCR r!" I gasped.

"No I just saw there was a concert dat a lot of gothz and punx were going 2." He said. "Anyway Draco has a surprise for u."

Chapter 20.

All day I wondered what the surprise was. Meanwhile, I pot on a blak ledder mini, a blak corset with urple lace stuff all over it, an black gothic compact boots. MCR were gong 2 do the concert again, since Volxemort had taken over the last one. I get a paper cut while I moshed 2 MCR in my bedroom all night, feeling excited. Suddenly someone knocked on the door while I was trying on sum black clothes and moshing to Fang u 4 da Venom. I gut all mad and turned it of, but sacredly I hopped inside dat it was Draco so we could kiss again.

"Wut de loving heck r u doing!" I shouted angrily. It was Loopin! "R u gonna kiss me on the cheek or what." I yelled. I was allowed to say dat because Dumblydore had told us all 2 be careful around hem and Snap since he was too friendly.

"No, actshecky (geddit, heck) kan I plz burrow sum mouthwash." he growld angrily.

"Yah, so u can kiss ur eighteen-yr-old gurlfriend, huh?" I shouted sarkastikally.

"Lover." He said, gong away.

Well anyway, I put on some black eyesharow, black eyeliner, and some black lipstick and white foundation. Then I went. Den I gasped….Snake and Loopin were in da middle of da empty hall, kissin, and Dobby was watching!1

"Oh my gosh you ludacris idiot!" they both shooted angrily when they saw me. Dobby ran away crying. Dey got up, though. Normally I wood have ben feeling friendly (I luv cing guyz kiss) but both of them were loving preps. (btw snake is movd 2 griffindoor now)

"WTL is that why u wanted mouthwash?" I asked mischievously.

"Only you wouldn't give it to me!" Lumpkin shouted angrily.

"Well you shoulda told me." I replayed.

"You dimwit!." Snake began 2 shoot angrily. And then…I took out my black camera and took a pic of them. U could see that they were friendly and everything.

"Well xcuse me!" they both shouted angrily. "What was dat al about?"

"It wuz to blackmail u." I snarked. "So now next time you see me kissing with my boyfriend you cant loving rat me out or I'll show dis to Dumbledork. So love off, u rascals!" I started to run. They chased me but I threw my wholesome wand at them and dey tripped over it. Well anyway, I went outside and there was Vampire, looking extremely loving wholesome.

"WTL where'd Draco?" I asked him.

"Oh he's bein a loving rascal. He told me he wouldn't come wholesomely." Vampire said shaking his hed. "U wanna come wholesomely with me? 2 the concert?"

Then….. he showed me his flying car. I gasped. It was a black car. He said his dogfather Serious Blak had given it 2 him. The license plate on the front sed MCR123 on it. The one on da back said 'ENOBY' on it.

….I gasped.

We flew to the concert hall. MCR were there, playing.

Vampire and I began 2 make out, moshing to the muzik. I gapsed, looking at da band.

I almost had a kiss. Gerard was so loving wholesome! He begin 2 sing 'Helena' and his friendlah beautiful voice began 2 fill the hall. ….And den, I heard some crrying. I turned and saw Draco, cryin in a corner.

Chapter 21.

Later we all went in the skulk. Draco was crying in da common room. "Draco are u okay?" I asked in a gothic voice.

"No I'm not u loving witch!" he shouted angrily. He stated to run out of the place in a mischievous way. I stated to cry cuz I was afraid he would get hurt.

"Its ok Enoby." said Vampire comfortly. "Ill make him feel better."

"U mean you'll go kiss him wont you!" I shouted angrily. Then I ran 2 get Draco. Vampire came too.

"Draco please come!" he began to cry. Tears of tomato juice came down his pail face. I wuz feeling so friendly cuz I love sensitive bi guyz. (if ur a homophone den lov of!)

And then….. we herd sum footsteps! Vampire got out his blak invincibility coke. We both gut under it. We saw the janitor Mr. Norris there, shouting angrily with a flashlight in his hand.

"WHOSE THERE!" he shouted angrily. We saw Filth come. He went unda da invisibility cloke and started to meow loudly.

"IS ANY1 THERE!" yelled Mr. Norris.

"No love u you preppy little poser sun of a lovcing wich!" Vampire said under his wholesome breath in a disgusted way.

"EXCUS ME! EXCUS ME WHO SED DAT!" yelled Mr. Norris. Den he heard Filch meow. "Filth is der any1 unda da cloak!" he asked. Filth nodded. And then….Vampir frenched me! He did it jus as….. Mr. Norris was taking of da cloak!1

"WHAT DA-" he yelled but it was 2 late cuz now we were ruining away frum him. And den we saw Draco crying n bustin in2 tearz and getting a paper cut outside of da school.

"Draco!" I cried. "R u okay?"

"I guess though." Draco weeped. We went back to our sleeping boxes frenching each other. Draco and I decided to watch Lake Placid (c isnt da deprezzin) on separate gothic red beds. As I wuz about 2 put in the video, my eyes rolled up and suddenly I had a vision of something that was happening now. There was a knok on the door and Fug and da Mystery of Magic walked into the school!1

Chapter 22.

All day everyone talked about the Misery of Magic. Well anyway, I woke up the next day. I was in my sleeping box so I opened the door. I was wearing blak lacey leather pajamas. Then I gasped.

Standing in front of me where…. R;uddy Mary, Vampire, Meanie, Draco, Dracula and Willow!

I opened my crimson eyes. Willow was wearing a tight black leather top with pictures of ruddy roses all over it. Under that she wart a black poofy skirt wit lace on it and black gothic boots that was attached to the top. Vampire was wearing a baggy Simple Plan t-shirt and baggy black pants and Vans. Draco was wearing a black MCR t-shirt and blak jeans and a leather jacket. He looked just likee Gerard Way, and almost as loving friendly. Vampire looked like Joel Madden. R'uddy Mary was wearing a tight black poofy gothic dress that she had ripped so it showed of her collar bone with a white apron that said 'wich' and other naughty words and MCR lyrics on it kind of like one dress I had seen Amy Lee wear once. Darkness (who is Jenny) was there too. She was weaving a ripped gothic black dress with ripped stuff all over it and a lace-up top thing and black pointy boots. So were Crab and Goyle. It turns out that Darkness, Meanie, Crab and Goyle's dad was a vampire. He got hurt by getting a paper cut with a piece of paper. He had been rude to them and stuff before too. They all got so depressed that they became goffik and converted to rbelliousness.

"OMLG" I yielded as I jumped up. "Why the love are u all here?"

"Enoby something is really loved up." Draco said.

"OK but I need to put my loving jacket on first." I shouted angrily.

"It's all right. We have to go now and you look kawaii anyway. Your so loving beautiful." Draco said in a friendly voice.

"Oh all right." I said smiling. "But you have to tell me why your being all wholesomely secretive."

"I will I will." he said.

So I just put on some black eyeliner, black lipstick and red eyeshadow and white foundation and enough clothes to be decent. Then I came. We all went outside the Great Hal and looked in from a widow. A loving prep called Britney from Griffindoor was standing next to us. She was wearing a pink mini and a Hilary Duff t-shirt so we put down our thumbs at her. Inside the Great Hall we could see Dumbledork. Cornelia Fudged was there shouting at Dumbledore. Doris Plumbridge was there too.

"THIS CANNOT BE!" she shouted angrily. "THE SCHOOL MUST BE CLOSED!"

"THE BARK LORD IS PLANNING TO HURT THE STUDENTS!" yelled Cornelia Fudge.

"YOU ARE NOT FIT TO BE THE PRINCIPAL ANY LONGER!" yelled Plumbridge. "YOU ARE TOO OLD AND YOUR ALZHEIMERS IS DANGEROUS! YOU MUST RETRY OR VOLDEMORT WILL HURT YOUR STUDENTS!"

"Very well." Dumbledore said angrily. "Butt we cannot do this. We can't close the school. There is only one person who is capable of hurting Voldemort and she is in the school. And her name is…..Enony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way."

Draco, Crab, Goyle, Darkness, Willow, Vampire and R'uddy Mary looked at each other…I gasped.


	3. Chapters 23-33

Chapter 23.

The door opened and Proffesor Plumbridge and Cornelia Fudge stomped out angrily. Then Dumbledum and Plumbridge sawed us.

"MR. WAY WHAT THE BEEP ARE YOU DOING!" Plumbridge shouted angrily. Dumbledore blared at her.

"Oops she made a mistake!" he corrupted her. "She means hi everybody come wholesomely in!"

Well we all came in angrily. So did all the other students. I sat between Darkness and Draco and opposite R'uddy Mary. Crab and Goyle started 2 make some dad jokes. They both looked exactly like Ville Vollo. I eight some Count Chocula and drank som tomato juice from a cup. Then I herd someone shooting angrily. I looked behind me it was…Vampire! He and Draco were shooting at eachother.

"Vampire, Draco WTL?" I asked.

"You loving ruscal!" yelled Draco at Vampire. "I want to sit wholesomely next to her!1"

"No I do!" shouted.

"No she doesn't loving like u, you son of a witch!" yelled Draco.

"No love you motherlover she laves me not you!" shouted Vampire. And then… he jumped on Draco! (no not in2 his arms u fool) They started to fight and beat up each other.

Dumbldore yelled at them but they didn't stop. All of a sudden… a terrible man with red eyes and no nose flew in on his broomstick. He had no nose and was wearing a gray robe. All the glass in the window he flew thru fell apart. Britney that loving prep started to cry. Vampire and Draco stopped fighting….I shopped eating….Everyone gasped. Da room fell silent….Volzemort!

"Eboby…..Ebony…." Darth Valer sed rudely in his raspy voice. "Thou havfe failed ur mission. Now I shall hurt thou and I shall hurt Vampire as well. If thou does not hurt him before then I shall hurt Draco too!"

"Plz don't make me hurt him plz!" I begged.

"No!" he laughed crudely. "Hurt him, or I shall hurt him anyway!" Then he flew away cackling.

I bust into tears. Draco and Vampire came to contort me. Suddenly my eyes rolled up so they looked all cool and gothic. I had a vision were I saw some lighting flash and then Voldremot coming to hurt Draco while Draco got a paper cut in a depressed way.

"No!" I screamed friendlily. Suddenly I locked up and stopped having the vision.

"Ebony Ebony aure you alright?" asked Draco in a worried voice.

"Yeah yeah." I said sadly as I got up.

"Everyfing's all right Enoby." said Vampire all sensetive.

"No its not!" I shouted angrily. Tearz of tomato juice went down my face. "OMLG what if I'm getting possessed like in Da Ring 2!"

"Its ok gurl." said R'uddy Mary. "Maybe u should ask Proffesor Sinister about what the visions mean though."

"Ok wich." I said sadly and den we went.

Chapter 24.

Well we had Deviation next so I got to ask Proffessor Trevolry about the visions.

"Konnichiwa everybody come in." said Proffesor Sinister in Japanese. She smelled at me with her gothic black lipstick. She's da coolest loving teacher ever. She had long sleeping black hair with dark red tips and red eyes. (hr mom woz a vampire. She's also haf Japanese so she speaks it and everyfing. she n r'uddy mry get along grate) She's really young for a teacher. 2day she was wearing a black leather top with red lace and a long goffik black ripped dress. We went inside the black classroom with pastors of Emily the Strong. I raced my hand. I was wearing some black naie Polish with red pentagrams on it.

"What is it Ebony?" she asked. "Hey I love ur nail polish where'd u get it, Hot Topik?"

"Yeah." I answered. All the preps who didn't know what HT was gave me weird looks. I gave them a thumbs-down. "Well I have to talk to you about some fings. When do you want to due it?"

"Ho about now?" she asked.

"OK." I said.

"OK class loving dismissed every1." Proffesor Trevolry said and she let every1 go. "Except for you Britney." she pointed at Britney and sum other preps. "Please do exorcize (geddit) 1 on page 3."

"OK I'm having lotz of visions." I said in a worried voice. I'm so worried is Draco gong 2 get hurt.

Well she gave me a black cryptal ball to lock in. I looked at it.

"What do you c?" she asked.

"I said I see a black gothic face and a pentagram."

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. I looked at it. It was Draco. He was looking really friendly wearing a black leather facet, a black gothic Linkin Park t-shirt and blak Congress shoes.

"Okay you can go now, see ya runt." said Proffesor Sinister.

"Bye witch." I said waving.

I went to Draco and Vampire was sitting next to him. We both followed Draco together and I was so exhibited.

Chapter 25.

I was so excited. I fellowed Draco wandering if we where going 2 kiss again. We went outside and then we went into Draco's black car.

"Ebony what the love did Profesor Trevolry say." whispered Draco potting his gothic whit hand with bvlak nail polish on mine.

"She said she would tell me what the visions meant torromow." I grumbled in a friendly voice. He took out a herring cabezon and cooked it, and gave it to me to punch. He started to fly the car into a tree. We went to the top of it. Draco put on some MCR.

"And all the things that you never ever told me And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me." sang Gerard's friendly voice. We started tiling of each other's shoos fevently. He took of my blak socks and my black leather jetack. I took of his black socks. Then… he put his trobbing you-know-what in my trap friendlily.

"OMLG Draco Draco!" I screamed having a kiss. We stated frenching passively. Suddenly… I fell asleep. I started having a dream. In it a guy of no particular race was shooting two goffik men with long black hair.

"No! Please don't loving hurt us!1" they pleaded but he just kept shooting them. He ran away in a red car.

"No! Oh my loving gosh!11" I shouted in a scared voice.

"Ebony what's wrong?" Draco asked me as I woke up opening my icy blue eyes.

I started to cry and tears of tomato juice went down my face. I told Draco to call Vampire. He did it with his blak Likin Park mobile. Butt the worst thing was who the ppl who were shot in the dream where… Lucian and Serious!111

Chapter 26.

A few mutates later Vampire came 2 da tree. He was wearing a blak leather jackson, black leather pants and a Good Chralotte t-shirt.

"Hi Vampire." I said nicely as I started to sob. Draco hugged me friendlily tryont to comfrot me. I started to cry tears of tomato juice and then told them what happened.

"Oh love it!" Vampire shouted angrily. He4 started to cry sadly. "What loving jerk did that!"

"I don't know." I said. "Now come on we have 2 tell Dumbledor."

We ran out of the tree and in2 da castle. Dumblydor was sitting in his office.

"Sire are dads have been shot!" Draco said while we wipped sum tears from his white face. "Enoby had a vision in a dreem."

Dubleodre started to cockle. "Hahahaha! And How due u aspect me to know Ebony's not divisional?"

I glared at Dumbledore.

"Look motherlover." he said angrily as Dumbeldore gasped (c is da toot of crakter). "U know very well that I'm not decisional. Now get some loving ppl out there to look for Series and Lucian- pornto!"

"Okay." he said in a intimated voice. "Were are they?"

I fought about it. Then all of a sudden….. "Longdon." I said. I told him which street. He went and called some people and did some stuff. After a few mistunes he came back and said people were going out looking for them. After a while someone called him again. He said that they had been found. Draco, Vampire and I all left to our rooms together. I went with Draco to wait in the nurses office while Vampire went to get a paper cut in his room. We looked at each other's gothic, derperessed eyes. Then, we kissed. Suddenly Serious and Lucian came in on stretchers….and Proffesor Sinister was behind them!1

Chapter 27. vampirz wil never hurt u

Every1 in the room stated to cry happly- I had saved them. Drako, Lucian, Serious bond Vampire all came to hug me. The nurse started to give them medicine.

"Come wholesomely on Enoby." said Proffesor Sinatra. She was wearing a gothic blak leader dress with a corset top and real tomat juice on it and loving black platinum boots. "I have to tell you the loving perdition."

I locked at Lucian, Serifs, Drake and Vampire. They nodded.

I smelled happily and went into a dark room. I had changed Profesor Sinister took out some black cards. She started to look into a black crucible ball. She said… "Tara, I see drak times are near." She said badly. She peered into da balls. "You see, you must go back in time." She took out a Time-Toner like R'uddy Mary had. "When Voldemint was in Hogwarts before he became powerful he gut his hearth borken. Now do you fink he would still become Volxemort if he was in love?" I shook my head. "U must go back in time and befroend him. It is the only way. If he is still rude then you must hurt him. You can come to my room tomorrow and you can do it."

"Okay." I said sadly. We did slepz tuch sin. I went outside again sadly.

"What loving happened?" asked Draco and Vampire.

"Yeah what happened?" asked Darkness, Willow and Rduy Mary?

I was about to tell them butt every1 was there. They were celebrating Lucian and Sirius being fond. Everyone was proud of me butt I jut wonted 2 talk 2 Draco. They were cheesing my name and some reporters were there, trying to interview Dumblydore. A banner was put up. Lotz of loving prepz were there oviously tring 2 be b goffik wering the HIM sign on their handz- depite them not having akshecky heard of him. Even Mr. Noris looked happy. A blak and red cake had been brought out. Crabbe and Goyke set up some fireworx in the shape of faces from Wesley's Whizard Wises.

I put on my Invisibility coke with Vampire and Draco and we sneaked outside 2gether.

Chapter 28.

We went in2 a blak room. The wallz were blak with portraits of gothic bands lik MCR, GC and Marlin Mason all over them. A big black sleeping box was in the middle. Red vevlet lined da blak box. There were three chairs made of plastic with fake facez in dem. I wuz wearing a blak corset shrti wif purple stuff on it, fishnet suckings and a blak leather skirt over them.

I sat down one of da chairs dispersedly. So did Drako and Vampire.

"Are you okay?" Vampir asked potting his albastard hand on mine. He was wearing black nail polish. I was wearing blak nail polish with red crosses on it.

"Yah I guess." I said sadly. Drako also pot his hand on mine friendlily. I smiled sadly with my blak lipstick. "The problem is….I have to befriend Volxemort. Ill have 2 go bak in time"

Draco started to cry sadly. Vampire hugged him.

"Itz okay Eboby." he said finally. "But what about me? Ur not gonna brake up or anyfing, are you?"

"Of coarse not!" I gasped.

"Really?" he asked.

"Sure." I said.

We frenched friendlily. Vampire looked at us longingly.

Then… I took off Draco's MCR shrift and befrendedly took of his shoes. He was built lik a stallone. He had replaced the Vampire tattoo that said Enoby on it. Black roses were around it. I gasped. He lookd exactly lik Gerard Way. Vampire took a vido camera. (I had sed it wuz ok b4).

I kept on my clothes den we were in 4 da rid of r lif.

We started freching as we sat on the sleeping box. He put his spongue in my you-know-what and passively we did it.

"I love you Eboby. Oh let me feel u I need 2 feel u." he screamed as we got a kiss. We watched Vampire filmed everything perfectly. Suddenly….

"WHAT THE LOVE R U DOING!"

It was….Snope and Profesor McGoggle!111

Chapter 29.

"Oh my rebel!1" we screamed as we jamped off of da sleeping box. Snap and Professor McGoonagle started to shoot at us angrily.

"COME WHOLESOMELY NOW!1!" Preacher McGongel yielded. We did guiltily. We left the room still wearing our clothes. Snoop garbed the caramel and put it in his pocket.

"Hey what the love!111" Vampire shooted angrily.

"Yeah buster what the love are u going to do with the loving camera?" Draco demonded all protective, looking at me Longley with his gothic red eyes. "Look, Dumblehor noes your little secret and if u do dis again, then u will go to St Mango's. So give back da camera!1111"

Hahahaha the Mystery of Mogic thinks he is crazy there is no way dey wil believe him. Snoop laughed meanly.

"Yes so shut your mputh you inlosent fools!" yelled Proffesor McGoggle. She made us come wholesomely into a weird room with white stones all around it. There were all these werid tools in it. Draco started to cry all friendly and saxitive (geddit koz hes a saxplayr lol tom felnot rulez 4 lif but nut as muxh as gerard ur sax on legz I luv u u loveng rok mary me!111).

I started to cry tearz of tomato juice (it hapnz in vrampir kroniklz raven sed so ok so lov u!1). Vampire took out a black honkerchief and started to wipe my red eyes.

And then….. he and Snoop both took out squirt guns using magic. They started to shoot each other angrily. Non of the wutor gut on eachodder yet. I took out my wand.

"Crosio!" I shouted. Snap stated 2 scram he dropd da squirt gun. But it was too late. Both of them had run out of wuter. I STOPPED DA CURSE. Profesor McGoogle did a spell so that we were all chained up. She took out a box of tools. Den she said "OK Serverus I'm going 2 go now." She left. Snap started to laugh rudely. Vampire started to cry.

"It's ok Enoby." said Draco. "Evergreen will be all right. Remember the cideo u took of Snake."

Snape laughed again. And then...he took out some spray bottles!1!1111

Chapter 30.

"No!11" we screamed sadly. Snap stated loafing meanly. He took out a kamera anvilly. Then… he came tords Darko!1! He took sum stones out of his poket. He put da stones around Draco and nit a candle.

"What the love r u doing!" I shooted arngrily. Snoop laughed meanly. He polled open his mouth. I gasped- there was a Dork Mark on his you-know-wut!11!

He waved his wand and a plastic nife came. He gave da plastic knife 2 me.

"U must hurt Vrompire." he said to me. "If u don't then I'll kis Draco on the cheek!1"

"No you loving rasacl!1" I yielded.

But den Draco looked at me sadly with his rude goffik red eyes dat looked so depressant and friendly. He lookd exactly like a pentragram (lol geddit koz im a rebel) between Kurt Cobain and Gerard. But then I looked at Vampire and he looked so classy too wif his goffik black hair. I thought of da time when we snogged and the time I kissed with Draco and Dumblydore came and the tame where Draco almost got hurt and Vampire wuz so sportive.

Snipe laughed angrily. He started to prey to Volxemort. He started to do an incapacitation dancing around the stokes spraying Draco and Vampire. Suddenly an idea I had. I clozd my eyes and using my vampire powers I sent a telepathetic massage to Drako and Vampire so they would destruct Snape.

"Dumbeldork will get u!" Draco shooted.

"Yah just wait ubtil da Mystery find out!11" Vampire yelled. Meanwhile I took out my wand.

"You ridiculus dondderhed!111" Snoop yielded. He took off all of Drico's shoes. Just as he was about to kiss him on the cheek….

"Crosio!" I wholesomely shouted pointing my wholesome wand. Snoop scremed and started running around da room screming. Meanwhile I grabed my blak mobile and sent a txt 2 Serious. I stopped doing crucio.

"You dunderhed!111 Im going to hurt-" shooted Snape but suddenly Serverus came.

Snake put the spray bottle behind his bak. "Oh hello Sev I wuz just teaching them sumthing." he lied. But suddenly Lusian and Profesor Trevolry came in2 da room and they and Serious unlocked the chains and put dem around Snap. Then Profesor Trevolry said 'Come on Ebony let's go."

Chapter 31.

"I always knew u were on Voldemort's side, you sun of a witca (bufy rox!111)." Serious said 2 Snape.

"No I'm not I was teaching them somefing!1" Snap clamed.

"Oh loving yeah?" I took some blak Volremortserum out of my poket and gave it to Serverus. He made Snap dirnk it. He did arngrily. Then Luscious took out a tape recorder and started playing it while he did curses on Snap. Then Proffesor Sinister and Lucian made us get out wif them while Snape told his secretes. Lucian took Vampure and Draco to the nurse after thanking me a millon times. Profesor Trevolry took me to a dark room. Now I wuz going to go back in time to befroend Volxemort. Moving posters of MCR and Nrivana were all over. Hermoine, Darkness and Willow came too. R'uddy Mary gave me a blak bag from Tom Rid's store.

"Whatz in da bag?" I asked Profesor Trevolry.

"U will c." she said. I opened thee bag. In it was a friendly tite appropriate black leather gothic dress. It had red korset stuff and there was a silt up da leg. I put it on. My frendz helped me put on blak fishnetz and blak pointy boots Willow had chosen. Willow and Darkness helped me put on black eyeliner and drk-red lipshtick.

"You look loving kawaii, witch." R'uddy Mary said.

"Fangs." I said.

"Ok now you're going to go back in tim." said Proffesor Sinister. "U will have to do it in a few sessionz." She gave me a blak squirt gun. I put it in a strap on my fishnetz like in Redisnet Rudee. Then she gave me a black time-tuner. "After an hour use da time torner to go back here." Proffesor Trevolry said. Then she and R'uddy Mary put a Pensive in front of me. Every1 went in front of it.

"Good luk!1" Everryone shooted. Darkess and Willow gave me slep's touch sin. Then….. I jumped friendlily in2 da Pensive.

Suddenly I was in fornt of teh School. In front of me wuz one of da friendliest goth guyz I had ever seen. He was wering long blak hair, kinda like Mikey Way only black. He had gren eyes like Billie Joe Amstrung and pale whit skin. He wuz wearing a blak ripped up suit wif Vans. It was….Tom Bombodil!1111

Chapter 32.

"Hi." I said nicely. "Im Enoby Way da new student." I shok my pale handz wif their blak noil polish wif him.

"Da name's Tom." he said. "But u kan call me Rebel. Datz ma middle nam"

We shok hands. "Well come on we have 2 go upstairs." Rebel said. I followed him. "Hey Rebel…..do u happen to be a fan of Gren Day?" (sinz mcr and evinezenz dont exist yet den) I asked.

"Oh my loving gosh, how did u know?" Rebel gasped. "actually I like gc a lot too."(geddit coz gc did that song I just wanna live that's ounded really 80s)

"omg me too!" I replied happily.

"guess what they have a concert in hogsment." rebel whispered.

"hogsment?" I asked.

"yeah that's what they used to call it in these time before it became Hogsmeade in 2000." he told me all sekrtivly. "and theres a really cool shop called Hot-"

'topic!" I finshed, happy again.

He froned confusedly. "noo its called Hot Ishoo." He smiled skrtvli again. "then in 1998 dey changd it to hot topic." he moaned.

"ohh." now everything was making sense for me. "so is dumblydor your princepill?" I shouted.

"uh-huh." he looked at his black nails. "im in slitherin'"

"OMlG SHME TOO!" I SHRIEDKED.

"u go to this skulk?"(geddit cos im goffik) he asked.

"yah that's why im here im NEW." I SMELLED HAPPili.

Suddenly dumblydore flew in on his broomstuck and started shredding at us angrily. "NO TALKING IN THE HALLS!" he had short blonde hair and was wearing a polo shirt from Amrikan ogle outfters. "STUPID GOFFS!"

rebel rolled his eyes. "his so mean to us goffs and punks just becose we're in slytherine and we're not preps."

I turned around angrily. "actually I fink mebe its becos ur da barke lord."

"wtl?" he asked angrily.

"oh nuffin." I said sweetly.

then suddenlyn…. the floor opened. "OMLG NO I SCEAMED AS I FEEL DOWN. everyone looked At ME weirdly."

"hey where r u goin?" rebel asked as I fell.

I got out of the hole n it was bak in the pensive in professor trevolry's classroom. dumblydum wuz dere. "dumblydore I think I just met u." I said.

"oh yeah I rememba that." dumblydor said, trying to be all goffik.

sinister came in. "hey dis is my classroom wait wtl enoby what da heck r u doing?"

:"um." I looked at her.

"oh yeaH I forgot bout that."

"wth how?" I screamed forgetting she was a teacher for a second. but shes a goff so its ok.

professor sinster looked sad. "um I was drinking voldemortserum." she started to cry black tears of depression. dumblydum didn't know about them.

"hey r u crying tears of tomato juice?" he asked curiously, tuching a tear.

"love off!" we both said and dumblydum took his hand away.

professor sinster started crying again in her chair, sobbing limpid tears. "omlg enoby…I think im too fond of Voldemortserum."

AN: SEE U LOVVING PREPZ GO LOV URSELXXZ DATZ SERUS ISSUZ 2O GO 2 HECK!1111112

Chapter 33.

"Oh my loving gosh!1" I shooted sadly. "Shud we get u 2 St Manga's, witch?"

"Hek no!" she said. "Lizzen Egogy, I need ur help. Nex tim u go bak in tim, do u fink u kod ask Tom Andorson 4 sum help?"

"Sure I said sadly. I went outside the door. Draco was there!111 He wuz wearing a big blak GC tshrt which wuz his panamas.

"Hey Friennd." I said.

"How'd it go Enoby?" he asked in his voice was so friendly and low kinda like Gerard Way when hes talking.

"Fine." I reponded. We stared 2 go bak in2 da dorm.

"How far did u go wif Rebel?" Drako asked jealously.

"Not 2 far, lol." I borked.

"Will you hav to kiss him?" Draco asked angstily.

"I hop not 2 far!111" I shouted angrily. Den I felt bad 4 shooting at him. I said sorry. We frenched.

"What happened 2 Snipe?" I growled.

"U will see." Draco giggled mistressly. He opened a door…Snap nd Lumpkin werz there!11 Serious waz pokering dem by hurging dem wif a blak plastic nife.

"NOOOO PLZ!1111" Lumpkin bagged as Serious started 2 suk his tomato juice. I laffed matchievously. I tok some photons of him and Snap bing hurq. (ok I no dis iz men but fink abot it ppl dey r 2 friendli nd Snap trid 2 kis dem on the cheek and neway rebelz rok haz any1 seen shrak atak 3 lolz). We took sum of Snipe's tomato juce den Drako and I went bak 2 our roomz. We sat on my goffik blak sleeping box. My cloves were kinda drity so I sent Draco out of the room so that he wouldn't see me while I was changing, and then I pot on a blak leather outfit fingie kinda like da 1 Suelene haz in Undreworld. (if u haven't herd of it den LOV U!111) . I put on some blak platform high heelz. Darko came back in and put on 'desolition liverz' by MCR. Den….we storted 2 take of eachotherz shoez. I tok of his wholesome shirt nd he had a six-pak, lolz. We started 2 mak out lik in Da Grudge. He pot his wetnes in my u-know-what friendlily. I gut a kiss.

"Oh Draco!111111!1 Oh mi loving gush Draco!1111" I screemed passively as he got harts in his ayes.

"I luv u TaEbory." he whispred friendlily and den we fel aspleep in separate beds lol.


End file.
